Behind the Mask

Today is Halloween, my favorite holiday of the year!  I love to create costumes and dress up as an imaginary character.  Pumpkins and spider webs filled with hairy creatures make me laugh.  What fun to be able to leave the ho hum of daily responsible living aside for just a few hours.  Being an adult hasn’t taken that away from me and I revel in it.  (I admit I also like the candy!)

Maybe you don’t share my delight in dressing up and that’s OK. Yet I wonder…how many of you wear an invisible mask on a daily basis? A mask that keeps a frozen smile on the lips appearing like all is well in your world; a brave front covering up the hurt on the inside from another fight with your teen. Maybe the mask hides an overly stiff spine keeping the outward façade strong while inside our inner being crumbles with feelings of helplessness as you wonder why it is so hard to parent your sensitive child.


Parenting a teen can be one of the most difficult jobs and too many of us soldier on taking blow after blow to our weakening system.  After all doesn’t everyone else seem to be managing? If your child has learning challenges, suffers from anxiety or depression, or struggles with low self esteem you know what I am talking about.  I have been there myself.

Perhaps it is time to take the mask off. To accept that you are not alright with the way things are and it is not fun! What if you could surrender to a new possibility that things can change and will improve?  Breathe deeply into that thought.

If the journey to return to a happier place with your child seems too hard, ask for help.  After all we ask for help when our car breaks down, or our roof needs fixing or countless other things we don’t know how to do.  These are all important….equally important is the precious relationship with your family members.  Take of the ‘I am fine’ mask and take a brave step forward. Talk to someone…..a friend, family member, or a parent coach like myself.  You deserve it and you won’t regret it. When you take that bold move, reconnecting with  your teen will follow. They need your action.

And I hope you join me by putting on a goofy costume and laugh together at the outcome.  Laughter is a great remedy in the medicine cabinet of life.